"Communication breakdown, it's always the same
Havin' a nervous breakdown, a-drive me insane"
Led Zeppelin said, sang, it best. Why exactly is it that communication can be so difficult? Why can it be so hard to say what you feel? Why is it so hard to deal?
I suppose there are many different reasons and explanations to these questions. It also depends on your personality type and how you deal with conflict.
However, in general it seems that communication is never taught as a basic life skill. I mean real, honest, open talk. Not the simple small talk, chit chat. I mean really getting down to the nitty gritty. Those pesky emotions that can be so hard to deal with. No one teaches you how to wade through these muddy waters. I suppose a majority of the resonsibility lies with the parents. They model behavior and we learn from it, for the better or worse. And if they aren't good at communicating, how do they know to teach or model the behavior themselves? They can't, and then it becomes a bad, habit-forming cycle that keeps spreading.
And I want to stop the cycle. It has taken me a while, but I think I have finally learned how to communicate better over the years. You have to speak up. You have to let your voice be heard, even if it is shaky. Ultimately, you have to let go of your fears and insecurities. Don't worry what others might think or say. As Dr Suess so wisely said, "Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." In the end, a true friend should love you for who you are and respect your perspectives.
So how do you deal? Do you find it hard to communicate ever? What helped you become better at it?